Top 5 things to do if you are being sexually harassed at work
Sexual harassment at work can sneak up on you. It might show up as creepy flirting, requests for “favors” (and not the kind you’d find on a to-do list), inappropriate comments or jokes, or that awkward moment when someone thinks they have permission to invade your personal space — spoiler alert: they don’t.
But more commonly, it could also be a work environment that feels more like a bad reality TV show. The kind where the drama is ongoing and one person makes everyone else uncomfortable. Or we could even take it further with serious stuff like women getting unfairly fired or demoted because they didn’t want to play the game. Spotting and shutting down this behavior is key to keeping your workplace safe, sane, and drama-free.
Here are five steps to take if you find yourself in this situation:
Step 1: Spotting Sexual Harassment
Let’s get real: recognizing sexual harassment at work isn’t always as obvious as a neon sign flashing “Harassment Here!” It can come in many shapes and forms, from unwanted flirting and requests for “favors” to off-color jokes and comments. It doesn’t always hit you over the head — sometimes it sneaks in subtly, like constant remarks about someone’s appearance, unfunny “jokes”, unsolicited touching, or sharing content that should have stayed in someone’s private messages. The key is to figure out if the behavior is unwelcome and makes the workplace feel more like a bad horror movie than a professional environment.
Trust your gut. If something feels off or makes you uncomfortable, it probably is! And heads up: many harassers start small with “jokes” or little comments to see what they can get away with, then push boundaries further. If you’re not ready to blow the whistle right away, that’s okay. Just keep a record of anything that raises your eyebrows — if things get worse, you’ll have a handy log of all the sketchy behavior.
It’s easy to downplay harassment, especially when society has taught us to shrug it off or laugh it away. You might think, “Was it really that bad?” or worry about being labeled a troublemaker. Even your co-workers might say, “Oh, they were just joking!” But here’s the thing: minimizing harassment doesn’t make it go away — it just makes it harder to spot and stop. So, trust yourself, don’t dismiss your feelings, and remember you deserve to work in a safe, respectful environment!
Step 2: Keep Receipts: Document the Drama
When it comes to handling harassment, documenting every incident is key to building a rock-solid case if you decide to report the behavior later. Grab a notebook or open a fresh digital document (on your personal account), and jot down the who, what, when, where, and how of each creepy encounter. Was it “Accidentally Bumped Into You in the Hallway” Day again? Or did someone think they were a stand-up comedian with some seriously bad material? Be specific, and don’t forget to note if there were any witnesses who saw the cringe-worthy behavior.
Make sure to stash your notes somewhere safe and accessible, you want to be able to retrieve your notes even if you decide to leave the job. Handwritten notes in a journal at home? Perfect. Prefer to go digital? Create a folder on a personal device or email yourself time-stamped entries that live in your personal inbox (bonus: it automatically includes the date and time!). The point is to make sure your notes are out of reach of the folks at work who might want to make them disappear.
Don’t wait until you’re ready to report. Document anything that makes you feel uncomfortable — no detail is too small. If things escalate and you decide it’s time to take action, you’ll have a treasure trove of receipts, witnesses, and details that can help back up your story and align with any security cameras or other records. Think of it as your personal insurance policy for if things go sideways!
Step 3: Save the Tea: Keep All the Receipts
If someone’s crossing the line, it’s time to save every scrap of evidence. Got a weird text? Screenshot it. Creepy emails? File those away. Awkward social media messages or posts? You know the drill. Hold on to everything — from photos and voicemails to any physical items (like bizarre notes or unwanted “gifts”). If the harassment happens face-to-face, make sure you jot down the date, time, location, what went down, and who else was there. Don’t trust your boss’s good intentions; keep this stash somewhere safe, like a personal email or cloud storage, where your employer can’t reach. Make sure to screenshot digital evidence to keep it from disappearing.
Stay organized by setting up your very own “evidence vault.” Whether it’s a digital folder on your phone or computer, or a physical file with tabs, put everything in one place and sort it by type — emails, texts, voicemails, and so on — or by date, like a timeline of drama. Add a quick note explaining why each piece matters, so when you need to, you can easily show exactly what’s been going on. Keeping everything organized not only makes it easier to tell your story, but also shows you mean business if you decide to report the harassment or take legal action.
Remember: your goal is to paint a clear picture of what’s been happening over time. So, keep that diary of events detailed and up-to-date. The more you document, the stronger your case will be!
Step 4: File the Report: Put It on the Record!
Alright, time to take the next step! Making a formal report about sexual harassment is like sending your employer a giant, neon “Heads Up!” sign. This is a key step because, legally speaking, they can’t be held responsible for what they don’t know. So, if things are getting uncomfortable, it’s time to let them know what’s up!
First things first, check out your company’s handbook. Most places have an employee handbook or policy that spells out exactly how to report harassment. If there’s a formal process, follow it to the letter — this is not the time to go rogue. If they don’t have a handbook or policy, then find out who the right person is to talk to. Think HR, your manager, or someone higher up the food chain. Reporting it to your cubicle buddy won’t cut it — it has to be someone who can actually do something about it.
When you’re ready to report, make sure you do it in writing and keep a copy for yourself. Even if you report verbally, follow up with an email or letter so there’s a paper trail. And don’t be afraid to use the actual words “sexual harassment” — no dancing around the issue! Be clear, be direct, and include all the key details: times, dates, what went down, and any witnesses. Your goal is to make it crystal clear what happened so there’s no room for confusion.
This is also a great time to reach out to an attorney. We’re here to help you navigate the process, answer your questions, and provide guidance on what to do next. Plus, if things get really serious, we’re already in your corner, ready to jump in and get things sorted ASAP!
Step 5: Watch Out for the Backlash: Document Any Retaliation
We get it — reporting sexual harassment can feel like stepping into a minefield. Some employers will step up and handle it like pros, launching an investigation and taking action. But, let’s be real — not all employers play by the rules. If your company decides to turn a blind eye, give you the cold shoulder, or worse, make life even harder for you, it’s time to use your detective skills again. Keep a record of every email, conversation, or feedback they send your way after you report.
The law is on your side here! It’s designed to protect you from any petty payback moves. If your boss tries to blame you, make your job a nightmare, demote, or even fire you — yep, that’s all retaliation, and you should be documenting it like it’s a crime scene. Even if things just start feeling… off, or the harassment escalates, jot it all down. It could give you more ammo if your employer decides to make things difficult. And don’t forget to chat with your attorney so you can decide the best way to move forward.
Coming forward takes guts. Many people speak up not just for themselves, but to help protect others too. Remember, you’re not in this alone. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or unsure about what to do next, give us a shout. We’re here to guide you every step of the way toward a safer, more respectful workplace! Contact us today.